Craigslist Casual Encounters: “I’d Rather Drink Gas and Piss on a Brush Fire”

15 Jun

I have long been a fan of Craigslist Casual Encounters.  Not of actually casually encountering anyone, but of reading the choicest posts aloud, in a variety of cartoonish voices.  This was especially entertaining the many years when I didn’t own a television and lived in the far east bay (read: “Redneck Territory”) where I didn’t really have anything to do at night other than troll the internet and talk to my cat.

Life is different now, but I still get drawn back into Casual Encounters on occasion.  I always think it’s going to be fun like the old days, knocking back a beer and reading a Daddy fantasy out loud in a poorly executed German accent while my cat eyes me with suspicion.  At some point in time, though, Casual Encounters jumped the shark for me.

I think it lost its luster when I started interacting with the Casual Encounters community, instead of just observing with admiration from afar.  That magical night when my friend and I were, inexplicably, up at 3 am, watching back to back Maury Povich clips, drunk on both alcohol and exhaustion, and we decided that we should post a casual encounters ad requesting impregnation because I “don’t like workin and want to go on matirnity leave.”  The responses to that post almost single-handedly destroyed my faith in humanity.

Yet here I am at it, again.  Last night I thought it would be fun to post this:

I would really like to stick my thumb up your nose.  Not just a little bit, but up past the knuckle.  It can take a little while to get it in, but with some patience and the right lubrication, I think you’ll find the experience can be really hot for both of us.  If we have a good time, maybe we can even try two fingers in one nostril!  We’ll see how it goes…  I’ll paint my nails whatever color you’d like.  Interested?

Partly, I wanted to see if it was possible to post an ad in w4m that wouldn’t get any responses, but deep down I knew that if there was such an ad, this wasn’t it.  I got a variety of sexy responses, from “When you say nose, do you actually mean nose?” to “I’d rather you stick your thumb up my ass.  Interested?” to “I’d rather drink gas and piss on a brush fire,” to a (rather impressive) penis photo, to a young, eager sounding slave who actually was interested.  And then, less than 2.5 hours after it had been posted, the ad was flagged and deleted.

I felt a variety of emotions after this; none of them pleasant.  I felt anger, on behalf of the woman out there who sincerely does want to stick her thumb up someone’s nose and the eager young man who desires it.  Who is the Craigslist community to tell me this kind of love is wrong?  This flag was discriminatory!  How is some innocent nose/thumb play worthy of getting flagged, whereas a request for impregnation or for someone to rub you down with Tide soap before getting busy perfectly acceptable to the Casual Encounters community?

Then I felt guilt for getting the hopes up of the guy that was into it.  And then, finally, sadness that the post garnered six responses in less than two hours.  I cannot actually identify one positive outcome from the entire experience.

So why do I feel so compelled to do it again?


One Response to “Craigslist Casual Encounters: “I’d Rather Drink Gas and Piss on a Brush Fire””


  1. Mid-June Check-in | {ungraceful animals} - June 17, 2011

    […] I hadn’t told you, because it’s called The Magic Wonder Blog.  My first post was about Craigslist Casual Encounters (obviously).  The blog boasts equally riveting content from Lizzy Acker, Audrey Dilling and […]

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